To Write, or Not to Write

by Melissa Wardwell

For most of my life, writing has been a constant companion. In middle school, a friend and I would craft poetry during science class, exchanging one-liners instead of focusing on the lesson—though somehow, we managed to pass. English class was another outlet, where “journal time” became a space for short stories about sea creatures, underwater adventures, and the life of a fisherman’s wife. As a quintessential daydreamer, I often found myself gazing out the window, imagining elaborate plots and daring heroes. Even now, more than twenty years later, I catch myself pausing to observe life outside or chat with my zebra finches as I type. There always seems to be something to draw my attention away.

Writing as an Outlet

Writing has always been my refuge, my source of happiness—until May of 2024. In just one week, everything that defined my life on earth shifted. My writing, my identity as a mother, my involvement in ministry with my husband, and even my friendships underwent drastic changes. While some changes were positive, others brought pain and confusion, leaving me feeling lost and sad. Each morning, as my husband and I read the Psalms, we found ourselves relating deeply to the words, which took on new significance. We clung to hope, believing only God could mend what was broken.

The Impact of Loss on Creativity

When I learned I would regain the rights for eight titles previously published by a publisher, I felt relief. Yet, the grief and pain swirling inside me caused my creativity to dry up. My mind struggled to function, and forcing myself to write only increased my stress. The very outlet that once brought healing had become a burden. After that release, I withdrew from the Christian writing community, losing touch with those who could support and pray for me as I adjusted to a new reality.

The grief and pain swirling inside me caused my creativity to dry up.

Rediscovering My Purpose

As 2026 drew near, I felt compelled to pick up the pen again and write beyond simple prayers like “Lord, Help me.” The Holy Spirit started to remind me why I began writing and what my mission was. He assured me that all was not lost and that there was still much work ahead. If I was going to continue, I needed wisdom and guidance, especially since I hadn’t independently published a book in seven years or written creatively in two. My mind was no longer as sharp as when I published my first book in 2014. Most importantly, I needed to rediscover the joy of writing. Instead of facing my grief, I hid from writing by working extra hours as a personal shopper.

A Prayer for Renewal

The Friday before Mother’s Day, I prayed and asked God to renew my heart and revive my joy for writing if that was His will. If it was time to stop, I asked Him to remove me from writing entirely—because I couldn’t decide for myself. That Sunday morning, I woke up from a dream—not just any dream, but one about a book with a plot I hadn’t seen in my genre. Questions flowed as I considered how to bring it to life. Wide awake, I went downstairs and did some research over coffee. Everything fit together effortlessly, and before long, I had the plot, three major hooks, and the character profile sorted out. It was just in time for church, thanks to multiple services.

Trusting in God’s Plan

I love it when God orchestrates a plan, even when we can’t sense His presence directly. We need only to ask and seek His will, rather than pursue our own agendas.

See you at the bookshelves!

Melissa Wardwell is a Michigan author, devoted servant of God, wife, mother, and unapologetic romantic. She writes heartfelt Christian fiction filled with faith, hope, second chances, and enduring love, inviting readers to discover God’s grace woven through life’s challenges and sweetest blessings. Learn more about Melissa on her website, Facebook, Instagram, or GoodReads.