Naysayers In Your Life? One Way to Deal With Them

ACFWAdvice, Authors and writing, Encouragement, Fear/Doubt, Friends of ACFW, writing 3 Comments

By Patricia Bradley

Today Justice Betrayed, my seventh book with Revell (9 books altogether) releases, and I’m super excited. It’s my “Elvis” book. I mean, you can’t write about Memphis and not have an Elvis book! It also has scenes set in Elmwood Cemetery, the oldest active cemetery in Memphis.

Oldest, active cemetery. There’s just something about those words that sound oxymoronish, don’t you think?

But I digress. When I thought about this release a few days ago, I thought about all the naysayers in my life when I first started writing. People who said, “You’re too stupid to write a book.” Maybe they didn’t say those actual words, but that’s what it sounded like to me.

Or, “Why do you want to waste your time writing down words? No one is ever going to read them.” Again, maybe not those exact words, but those sentiments.

Or, “Oh for Pete’s sake, don’t you want to have some fun? Surely you can take time for lunch…all work and no play”…It might not be lunch—it could be something like, “Come watch TV with me.” And it’s usually a show you have absolutely no interest in, and in fifteen minutes the other person is nodding off. I’ve never understood why it takes two people to sleep through a television show.

So, why would anyone not want you to do something you love? I realize many writers have great, supportive family who encourage them…but I didn’t. What do you do when you DON’T have that support?

First, you have to accept you can’t change the other person (or plural). What you can change is how you react to it.

Use their criticism. Use it? Yes. Let it spur you on to excel. I remember thinking that I would show the people who thought I couldn’t get published how wrong they were.

Their disapproval made me work harder. I dug in. Learn everything I could about the craft (something that I continue even now). Eventually I went to writing retreats and classes, and yes this was before I was published. You have to invest in your writing career, whether it’s time or money or both.

And guess what? When I received my first contract, my biggest critics were so proud of me. They even admitted they’d been wrong. That they’d discouraged me because they knew how hard it was to get published, and they hadn’t wanted me to be disappointed and hurt.

So, here’s your takeaway: You’re going to have critics, people who believe what you’re doing is pie-in-the-sky. Work hard to prove them wrong. And remember they only want what’s best for you—believe that whether it’s true or not. Bless their hearts.

When naysayers come calling, prove them wrong! @ptbradley1 #ACFWBlogs #writing Click To Tweet

Winner of an Inspirational Readers’ Choice Award in Suspense, Patricia Bradley lives in North Mississippi with her rescue kitty, Suzy, and loves to write suspense with a twist of romance. Her Logan Point and Memphis Cold Case Novels are available at all on-line retailers and major bookstores. JUSTICE Betrayed, the third book in the Memphis Cold Case Novels released June 5, 2018. Connect with Patricia on her blog, Twitter (@ptbradley1) and Facebook.

 

Comments 3

  1. I look forward to reading this! Elvis is such a part of Mississippi and Memphis! Great advice here, too!

  2. Naysayers! Wow! I cannot count the number of sighs I receive every time I tell someone I’m writing a novel. The tone in their responses shouts disapproval and frustration into my ears, although not verbal. I must say that my mother was my first cheerleader and now she has Alzheimer’s, so her support is minimal. My husband who was skeptical at first has become one of my biggest fans, along with my youngest sister. My daughter has finally joined the support train too. Yes! When we feel God’s call to write, we must press forward regardless the naysayers, and we’ve had plenty. Winning first place in romantic suspense in the Foundations Contest at The Blue Ridge Christian Writers Conference sure boosted my weary writing efforts and raised a lot of eyebrows with my naysayers! I’m not published yet, but my day is coming. Yay! Great article, Pat!

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